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Old 07-21-17, 08:12 PM   #41
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

Remember how I've talked about women's pain--and most particularly, women of color's pain--being dismissed? How doctors and nurses often smirk as they tell us to stop exaggerating, that it's never as bad as we 'pretend' it is?

Well, a fifteen year old girl just died, in California, after doctors told her TWICE that her chest pain was 'inflammation' and that some painkillers and rest would do the trick.

Why bother with an Xray or any serious examination, after all? It's a girl complaining of pain, how bad can it be?

How bad indeed.

Now she's dead, her family has no answers, and are also struggling to pay for a funeral.

(If you feel moved to help them, there's a link in the article)
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Old 07-24-17, 05:31 AM   #42
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

A 12 girl is raped by a family member--and don't come back with, 'how do you know that?' She's 12, she CANNOT consent, it's rape, end of discussion.

So she's raped. She is impregnated by her rapist. She wants an abortion.

She does not have a good relationship with her mother, so she's seeking a waiver to the parental consent requirement for abortion.

Keep in mind: she's pregnant at 12 and not in a good home situation; no father, not a good relationship with her mother, and a family member--likely on her mother's side--raped her repeatedly. If she carries to term, what will happen to that child?

Family court approves the waiver, and gives this pregnant child permission to have an abortion

Enter two 'pro life' attorneys who think she's too young to make such a decision about her own body, and about the life of the fetus.

But she's apparently not too young to carry that baby to term, and to have the responsibility of that baby for the next however many years.

And never mind that DAMAGE that a pregnancy at that age will do to her body, on top of the sexual and emotional abuse she's already endured. Who cares about that, or about her?

It's all about the all important fetus--and the right of men to make decisions about women's lives and bodies.

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Old 07-30-17, 12:18 PM   #43
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

Now for some levity.
Male writer for Slate tweets, "Advice to parents: teach your daughters to say "no" firmly and mean it. Men sense women's willingness to yield."

Women on twitter: Do you even know how many women are killed by men they said "NO" (firmly and clearly) every year?

Male writer: 'Actually' I wasn't talking about sexual assault, I meant like Maxine Waters exchange with Steven Mnuchin.

Women: Oh, you mean when she had to repeat 39 times "Reclaiming my time" as he spoke over her; then when she had to ask the MAN with the gavel to explain the rules to Mnuchin after she had just explained them to him, and STILL he didn't actually answer the question?

Male writer: These women and their "twitter outrage!"
And this, for those in the back, is why parents need to teach their SONS, that they need to listen to what women are saying, not what they want women to say.

This is why parents need to counteract current society's message that talking over women, ignoring women, objectifying women, never listening to what women are actually saying, putting their own wants and likes over those of all women, is normal.

This is why parents need to explain to their sons that women are not responsible for boys', male teens', or men's actions against women.

This is why parents need to make clear that, "she made me do it" is never a reason nor a justification to violate the rights of women.
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Last edited by azteclady; 08-03-17 at 03:37 PM. Reason: misplaced possessive apostrophe
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Old 08-03-17, 04:11 PM   #44
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

In the great abortion debate, a couple of things are usually omitted by the "every fetus' life is sacred!"* brigade.

For one, cis-men can--and do--impregnate people with uteri and walk away with zero consequences, all the time.

Yes, yes, yes; those people can demand paternity tests and whatever, and go to court, and spend YEARS trying to get some child support from those men. A hell of a lot of the time, fathers shrug their financial (and emotional) responsibilities off, and go on their merry way.

And you know what? No one ever says to cis-men of any age, "Abortion is murder, stop having sex!" while all over the place, men will snark at people with uteri, "if you don't want to get pregnant, stop having sex, you slut!"

But gee, you know, it *does* take a man's sperm inside an uterus body for pregnancy to happen. Funny that.

Another fact often bypassed by so-called 'pro-life' advocates is the fact that women's and trans men's bodies belong to them, and that pregnancies take a toll on those people's health. For them, the moment sperm meets ovum, the person in whose body this happens, stops being a fully autonomous human being. Their life and health cease to matter. Only the zygote's wellbeing matters--and that only until it is born.

Because if the person with the uterus is too young, too poor, too ill, already has more children than they can support, etc etc etc...well, that's not the so-called pro-lifers' problem, is it? That person could have chosen *not* to get pregnant, by not having sex--the slut.

Which bypasses the many pregnancies that are the result of continued sexual abuse (particularly of minors) or of rape.

But you know what? When we start defending abortion only by pointing out pregnancies from abuse and rape, we are still short-changing women and trans men.

People with uteri, even those using multiple contraception methods, always risk conception when they have intercourse with someone with a penis. We have the uterus, after all.

And many people with uteri simply cannot *afford* reliable contraception methods.

Regardless of which, the moment we start demanding that people with uteri justify their decisions over their own body, we are stating, unequivocally, that those people are simply vessels (hosts, is you will) for cis men's sacred seed, and not fully capable human beings.

Today's rant brought to you by this post, by Dr Jen Gunther.


~ * ~



* Yes, I'm totally humming "every sperm is sacred" right now

Personal note: I apologize to any and all trans people who have read this since I posted it originally; I did not intend to erase trans men with uteri, yet I did. I have now edited this post and the re-post at my blog, to try to better reflect all people. Please forgive me, I was thoughtless.
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Old 08-08-17, 06:51 PM   #45
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

Who here knew that men can be diagnosed with--and die from--breast cancer?

Oh, you didn't. Well, it's true.

It is a hell of a lot less common than prostrate cancer, but it happens. It has also have some pretty visible crusaders among famous/celebrity women, and it's seen often as a blameless illness: it's in the genes, so if anyone in your family had it at some point, it's not your 'fault' you got it.

But, what about vulvodynia or vaginismus?

First, who is just hearing about these for the first time right now?

Yeah, thought so.

Two main reasons there's so little knowledge or conversation around these:
  • One, women rarely talk about pain during intercourse. We have been told that first penetration hurts (that pesky hymen!), and we have been taught and socialized to be either madonnas (sexual agency? what sexual agency?) or whores (what do you mean, it hurts? are you defective or something?). So, talking about pain during sex means that you are having sex, and that you suck at it.
  • Second reason? Most doctors dismiss our pain offhand, regardless of the complaint, and regardless of the evidence. Doctors, male and female, have been socialized that women are whiners who complain over everything, no matter how trivial, and they are often not even aware of how entrenched that belief is--they just react.
Also, to no one's surprise--if you are a woman or if you have been paying any attention--there's little to no funding for these conditions. Those are female body-only conditions, there's nobody got time or money for that, least of all the government.

While prostate cancer, testicular cancer, and erectile dysfunction are men-only diseases, so of course there's interest and money and time.

Shocking, I know.

Ranting aside: if you are person born with a vagina for whom penetrative sex is painful, this is NOT 'the way it's supposed to be.' It will likely be difficult to find a health practitioner who will listen to you (what else is new?) but persevere: you are not defective, and you shouldn't be forced by society's expectations to suffer in silence and isolation.

Personal note: I realized that my original wording erased the experience of trans men; I was thoughtless and this knee jerking is hurtful and harmful. I apologize. I have now also edited the re-post at my blog.
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Last edited by azteclady; 10-04-17 at 03:53 PM.
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Old 08-08-17, 07:15 PM   #46
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

I watched Oz, i'm familiar with male breast cancer, and yes i knew it wasn't something made up for the show.

Furthermore: if you are a woman suffering from uncomfortable/painful yet willing sexual intercourse, PM or e-mail me and i will refer you to my mother, who dealt with these issues by having to fly across the country 20 years ago because no treatments were available on the east coast at that time. She will happily connect you to professionals who can help. You can use my e-mail if you wish to remain anonymous.
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Old 08-16-17, 12:50 PM   #47
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

Male doctor: "Menstrual pain can be as bad as having a heart attack"

MSM: *minor shock*

Male doctor: "Resources for study of women's pain and menstruation have historically been minimal"

MSM: "Huh"

Male doctor: "Women's pain is minimized, ignored, and mocked, at an institutional level; on average, women wait 26% longer to be treated in emergency rooms than men complaining of the same symptoms"

MSM: "Really???"

Women: "No shit, Sherlock"

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Old 08-16-17, 01:51 PM   #48
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

"Why do you keep hating on misogynist white cis men? #notallmen, you know?"

If fewer white cis men were passing so many laws that directly attack women, and if the majority of people proposing and supporting such laws were *not* misogynist white cis men, I probably would stop.

But here we are: Texas just passed a law that requires women to have extra insurance to cover abortion--a LEGAL right, per the Supreme Court of the country--with NO exceptions for rape, incest (!!!!) or fetus deformities.

#notallmen, only enough of them.

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Oh, and here's a suggestion: if you are not one of those men? My rants and diatribes are not directed at you, and you don't need to let me know that #notallmen.

Also, you could speak up and against misogynists and their laws yourself.
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Old 09-06-17, 08:55 PM   #49
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

So a couple of (male) bright lights in Hollywood decided that making 'an all-female' Lord of the Flies would be a really! new! and fresh!, and never-before-thought-of! idea.

Except, neither so fresh nor 'never before thought of.'

By a really long shot.

See the book Beauty Queens by Libba Bray, published in 2011, which was optioned for film right off the bat.

And read what happened with that:
"We know about the feedback loop of opportunity: Men get more chances to tell their stories, so if some work and some don’t, No Big. The successes are rewarded with more chances to make movies and the failures…are rewarded with more chances to make movies. But, as we’ve just witnessed with Wonder Woman ($800+ million, the most successful DC Universe movie EVER, woman director), Hidden Figures ($230+ million, 2 women producers, woman screenwriter adapting a book written by a woman), and Girls Trip ($100+ million, 3 women writers), women don’t get the same benefit of the doubt. If we win, it’s a fluke, and if we fail, it’s a failure for all women; the men in power throw up their hands and say, “Welp. That didn’t work. Guess people just don’t want to see women.” And, of course, this gets double- and triple-layered for women of color."
Read the full piece here.

And, since we are here. On that Wonder Woman, most successful DC Universe movie ever bit? Anyone remembers how the press talked about Patty Jenkins, the director? "Why would they have a woman whose last movie (Monster) had a budget of only 8millions, directing a project as big as Wonder Woman?" Never mind, of course, what Monster earned at the box office (34+millions), or the Oscar for Charlize Theron, or that the top movie critic (Roger Ebert) named it the third best film of the decade in 2009.
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Old 09-16-17, 02:21 PM   #50
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Re: International Women's Day 2016/2017

Back in the 1870s, Scandinavian archaeologists studying the Viking site of Birka excavated a number of burial sites, among other things. One of these has since been known as Bj 581.

Bj 581 contains one skeleton, weapons, two horses, and game pieces, long thought to be used as strategy tools to plan battles. Obviously, this was the grave of a warrior.

A male Viking warrior, natch.

Fast forward a hundred years or so, when osteological studies of the skeleton indicated that this person was female. Immediately, there were two camps in the scientific community.
  • One, the osteological experts were confused by the age of the bones; the grave clearly belonged to a warrior, there was one skeleton, of course it was a male, case closed.
  • Two, the grave clearly belonged to a warrior, there was one female skeleton--who clearly couldn't be the warrior in question--ergo, she was his wife/servant/tribute, and his body had been stolen or...something.
Never mind the fact that legends and myths about fearsome female Viking warriors (hello, Valkyries! hello, shield maidens!) have been around for over a thousand years. Those are just legends!*

Fast forward again, just about four decades this time, and we have more studies on Bj 581--this time with more science and technology! And...not only do the bones look female, the DNA shows they are female.

So we have a warrior's grave, with offerings showing this was a high ranking individual, held in enough regard to merit burying two freaking horses with them--and I remind you, horses at the time were highly valuable, not everyone had one, let alone two, to toss in a burial--and the skeleton in the grave is indisputably female.

Yay, proof that female warriors were actually a thing! And a number of pieces pop up explaining how androcentrism in science, in this case archaeology, hurts everyone by making unwarranted assumptions about humanity in general, based on artificial gender constructs.

...and simultaneously, a number of articles pop up explaining how this is all about 'political correctness' and not actual history, and how probably the bones from which the DNA was taken are not even the ones originally in the grave, and how the Valkyries in the Edas and runic inscriptions are obviously not a reference to actual people, and...

Oh yeah, we live in a 'postsexism' era, don't we?



* Britain's Arthur might be a historical figure, because male! but female warriors? c'mon, that's just silly.
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